Work Life Balance for Speech Pathologists: Mindful Time Management Tips for Therapists, Clinicians, & Private Practice Owners

47. Maycember: Tips for the End-of-the-School-Year Chaos

• Theresa Harp

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Feeling crushed by the May-time madness? You're not alone! Join me as we tackle what social media is now calling 'Maycember,' the month where speech pathologists, parents, and virtually everyone with a calendar feel the squeeze. I'll walk you through five strategies to pull you from the brink of calendar chaos. Learn to assert your authority over your time, make peace with turning down invites, and master the art of owning your choices, even if it means missing out on that seventh bake sale this week.

We'll tackle those sneaky 'open loops' that can take a toll on your mental load, and I'll show you how to 'choose your hard' by investing your energy wisely to prevent burnout. Plus, don't miss out on the announcement of my free webinar that will help align your daily grind with what's truly important. So mark your calendars for May 30th and in the meantime, dive in to today's episode and start taking control of the chaos today.

Are you sick and tired of feeling overwhelmed by all the things? I can help. Schedule a free consult today.

Come join the SLP Support Group on Facebook for more tips and tricks!

Follow me on Instagram! @theresamharp

Learn more about Theresa Harp Coaching here.

Theresa Harp:

This is Y your S speech P ath: M mindful T time M management for the B busy SLP. My name's Theresa Harp and, as a mom and speech pathologist turned productivity coach, I know a thing or two about how hectic life can be. If you're an SLP who's overworked, burnt out and feeling like you're constantly falling short as a therapist and a mom, then this is the podcast for you. I cover time management and mindset strategies so you can learn to love your work and your home life at the same time. Let's dive in.

Theresa Harp:

Hey SLPs, welcome back to the podcast. Today I'm talking about a term that I've been seeing popping up all around social media right now and maybe you've seen it too and that word or term is Maycember. And I find this very amusing because, number one, it's so relatable. Number two, just the different comedians and how they talk about this, and different comedians and how they talk about this and approach. It is just, it's just very humorous. So if you don't know what I'm talking about, maycember is essentially referring to the amount of responsibilities, obligations or maybe not, we'll get to that events, experiences, appointments, holidays, celebrations that are just all crammed into the month of May, and this is particularly relatable or relevant for parents, for those who have children who are in school. You know what I'm talking about, where there's just so many things on the calendar that are happening and you feel like you're going to lose your mind. And I would offer that, even if you are not a parent, you can probably relate to a lot of what I'm going to say in this episode. In fact, what I'm going to be talking about today is something that applies. These are tips and strategies that apply for any time of the year. It's just that right now, because it is such a busy season, this information is going to be especially helpful.

Theresa Harp:

Okay, so what I'm going to do is talk to you about five strategies that I use. Sometimes I use some of these more than others, but strategies that I use to help myself maintain a some, some degree, some sense of control over my calendar help me to feel a little bit less overwhelmed and stressed when there's so much going on and get you and it gets me out of this position of paralysis or shutdown and into a place where you feel like, okay, I've got this. Yeah, there's a lot going on, but I can handle it. And that's the piece that I want to encourage you to consider as you're listening to this episode, because what I will say is that, yes, I have found the social media content about this topic to be very funny.

Theresa Harp:

However, there is this underlying message that seems to be sent by society, and I would love for this to change but there seems to be this underlying message that, hey, this is what it is, so buckle up, because you really can't do anything about it, you gotta just get through. And I want to challenge that belief. I want to challenge that perspective, because, while I do agree that, yes, there are some things that you might not be able to control in this time of year or any time of year for that matter there is far more that you can control if you shift your perspective, if you start thinking about what you can do, if you start taking ownership and responsibility. And, in fact, that is the first strategy that I want to offer is the importance of recognizing what I call, and others call, your time authority or your time ownership, and that is, very simply, the concept that you do have the right to say yes or no to the things that you're putting on your calendar. You have the choice in, I would say, the majority of the time. You have the choice in what you are going to say yes to and what you are going to say no to, even if it doesn't always feel like it, even if it's not always presented that way to you, even if you don't want to acknowledge that you have a choice, because then it means that you might have to make a difficult decision or maybe disappoint some people, and it's better to just tell yourself that you have to do these things. Well, tough love maybe, but I want you to really consider how truthful that is. I want you to really consider how truthful that is and, like I said, while you cannot control absolutely everything that you put on your calendar, perhaps you do have far more ownership over this than you are currently operating from. So, and sometimes just knowing that you have a choice even if you're not going to make a different choice about saying yes to something or saying no to something, even if it doesn't change your decision, sometimes simply having the knowledge and knowing that you could say yes, you could say no, that you do have a choice and an option here can be empowering on its own, even if you don't do anything differently about it. So I'll give you this example, and this is an example of something, that I chose to do something differently than I normally would.

Theresa Harp:

So right now we've got field day coming up for my three of my kids' school, and field day is something that I've always volunteered for. It's something it's sort of like a tradition. We do it every year and it's just sort of it's fun. I think in many ways it's fun. It's fun to see the kids with their friends. It's fun to see them, you know, trying new things, being, you know, competitive and all of that. It's also fun to be around some of the other families who I don't always get to see, and we have to do a certain number of volunteer hours for our school. So it's something that we did. It's an easy way to get a good amount of hours this year.

Theresa Harp:

The registration page came home recently and I started just out of habit, just to fill in my name on the volunteer line and I caught myself and I was like you know what was like you know what. We've had a lot going on lately and I'm kind of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted and I don't have to do this. I can choose to say no, and so I did. I chose not to volunteer and I had to think about it. I mean, it was like you know, a couple minutes that was. It was a quick process for me. You know I did have the sort of mom guilt of well, the girls are used to me being there and I know they're going to give me a hard time about it and I'm like you know what it is, what it is Like I don't have to be there. I really could use that time for some of these other things that I've got going on and I know that right now I might feel like doing it. Maybe I think I, you know, I'm on board with doing it. But when I sort of forecast ahead to when the field day event actually is, I probably am going to feel differently because there's going to be even more going on.

Theresa Harp:

At that point it's like the very end of school and I'm recognizing that most likely I will not have a whole lot of bandwidth or capacity to do it. So I just said no and that's an example of me recognizing my time authority. Now, that might seem like a strange example if you're listening, because you could argue well, teresa, it is totally voluntary. You could say no, like that's just by definition. That's what volunteering is right, but I would offer that there are probably things that you volunteer for that you think you have to say yes to, that you really don't. And also think about the things that maybe you aren't volunteering for, that you think you absolutely have to do. Maybe they're not volunteer things, they're just events going on, parties you're invited to, so on and so forth. You can also say no to those things. Right, you can choose to say no or you can choose to say yes. It's up to you. So recognizing your time, authority and being in control of what you say yes to and what you say no to.

Theresa Harp:

The second strategy that I want to offer is what I'll call looking below the surface. So I'm picturing an iceberg. I don't know why I'm picturing this, but I'm picturing an iceberg in water. I don't know why I'm picturing this, but I'm picturing an iceberg in water. And when you are on a boat sorry, now my brain is thinking about Titanic but when you're thinking about when you're on the ship, when you're on the Titanic and you see the iceberg right ahead, you can see only what's above the surface, right, but there is so much that exists below the surface level that obviously plays a huge impact on the outcome, at least for the Titanic going to say yes to something. Think about what is the amount of time and energy that it's going to cost me, not just during this event, not just when I am there, but before and after the thing that I'm saying yes to right. So a simple example I'll stick with the birthday party theme from before that example If you say yes to a birthday party for your kids, you know that it's not just the 90 minutes or two hours of the party itself that you're saying yes to right.

Theresa Harp:

You're also saying yes to having to decide on what gift to give, to actually purchase the gift, to wrap the gift, the driving there and back right. Purchase the gift, to wrap the gift, the driving there and back. Right Now this may seem trivial, but when you're in a month like May-Sember and you've got a million things going on, these are the little things that can make a very big difference. So stop and ask yourself, okay, what besides this actual block of time on my calendar is? What else goes into this event? What else do I have to consider in terms of responsibility and time? Because those are what I would call open loops, right? We've got a million birthday party invitations that come around this time of year and it's like, oh my gosh, these are the open loops of oh, I've got to get gifts for X, y and Z. I have to make sure I didn't RSVP to that party. Oh, I said we could go to that party and I actually was wrong. We can't go. I got to change the RSVP. How am I going to get them to that party? I got to see if someone can carpool, or I got to see if my husband can make arrangements, or whatever. These are the sort of open loops, these decisions that are running through the mental to-do list, that you need to factor in. Okay, because that way you're getting realistic about what's involved.

Theresa Harp:

The third strategy that I want to offer is finding a simple system that works for you. So this could be something like a post-it or a sheet of paper that has all the important dates on it, or maybe you use the notes app on your phone, or it's your Google calendar with a million notifications, like me. It could be many different things, right, but you need to find some sort of tracking system that works for you, and it can be and should be. I think it's beneficial if it's incredibly simple. The simpler the better.

Theresa Harp:

So what I like to do, particularly for birthday parties and for holidays and stuff, I will keep a running list of the gifts that I need to purchase, because this time of year there's a ton of gifts it's Mother's Day, father's Day, teacher Appreciation, end of the school year, birthday parties you know you get it right. So I just keep a running list that has the gifts that I need to buy, because otherwise those are something that I will forget all about until we're basically on our way to the party and I'm like, oh crap, we got to stop somewhere and grab something, right. So keeping that list in one central place. And I also do that for the birthday party dates because, for whatever reason, my brain can't just look at the calendar and find the dates of the birthday parties at once. I have to sort of. I can't, my brain can't like recognize those from everything else that's on the calendar. So I just keep a list of those separate, so that it's just one added sort of measure to help me stay on track and make sure I get them where they need to be. I also do this for purchases that are not necessarily gifts but just extra things that I have to buy, like what's an example? Okay, so, school concerts there's a spring concert for the girls, and so that requires a special shirt, a certain kind of shirt that they have to wear Spirit Day, you know, they might need to purchase something for, like, a theme day that's coming up. So, the extra things that I have to order or go out and buy, making a list for those so that I don't forget about them and it's just right there at my fingertips in my phone and I can pull the trigger whenever I happen to have a free minute and I'm thinking of it.

Theresa Harp:

Okay, the fourth strategy I'm going to offer is choose your hard. So, out of all the things that are going on, which of these things do you want to go the extra mile for and which ones are the ones that you can push the easy button for? So really deciding what are the things that you want to put in the time and effort and thought and what are the things that you're just going to allow to be simple, so, at this time of year, I often wind up letting the kids buy school lunches more than making home lunches, because it's just one less thing than that I have to think about and spend time doing For gifts. It's like, okay, teachers, do I want to go and really put thought and time into a very thoughtful gift for them, something that's really meaningful, that I know they're really going to like, or is this the time that I just have to get the simple gift cards that I know they'll still like as well, and it makes my life easier and I can just, you know, get five or six of them and cover all the bases at once, right? So choose your hard, decide what you're going to allow to be hard and what you're going to allow to be easy, and then, last but not least, maintain perspective.

Theresa Harp:

And I say this with sincerity. I don't I'm not being disingenuous at all, not being disingenuous at all. I have to remind myself a lot that these are many of these things, are the things that I will miss at some point. Right, and I'm not saying that to gaslight myself, I'm not saying that to gaslight you at all. I'm just saying that sometimes, when I maintain perspective and I remind myself that this is temporary and this will pass and this is, you know, a lot of these things are the memories that we're making as a family, that I'm making as a mom, and when I really just tap into that and remind myself about it, it helps my brain sort of slow down, helps my body to get calm and helps me to be more present.

Theresa Harp:

Because I often run the risk and I see this in my coaching clients as well run the risk of stressing about all of these extra things. And the more you stress about them, the less obviously, the less you enjoy it. And I have to recognize and remind myself that stressing will not help me be more successful. With these extra things on my plate, like worrying about it and stressing about it, that's not helping in any way, it's not productive and it takes the joy out of the experience. And what is the point of that right? How is that helpful at all? If these are the moments that I'm sort of trying to hold on to as a parent, then why am I going to allow myself to stress and worry about these things? So, instead really reminding myself about what's truly important, going back to my core needs and values and looking at them and seeing how they align with the things on my calendar. And if they don't align with the things on my calendar, then maybe this is a no or a no for now. Maybe this is a no or a no, for now, all of that can help me sort of stay level-headed and help me remember about what truly matters.

Theresa Harp:

And speaking about what truly matters, and Maycember at the end of this month it is Thursday, may 30th to be exact I'm hosting a free webinar.

Theresa Harp:

I think I've mentioned it on the podcast before, but it's a free webinar that is about how to identify what truly matters most to you so that you can start shifting the way that you spend your time, and a lot of the stuff that I talked about today is actually very relevant to the content that we're going to be covering in that webinar.

Theresa Harp:

So I would invite you to sign up for the webinar. Even if you can't make it live, you can catch the recording. There will be a recording that will be available, at least for the short term, and I really do believe that it's going to shift your perspective on what matters most to you and how you can start doing some of the things that we've talked about here to sort of support you and figure out okay, I get all of this, but how do I actually do it, how do I actually put this into play in my life? So mark your calendar. That's Thursday, may 30th, 7 pm Eastern. I hope to see you there. All right, that's it for today. Short and sweet, happy Maycember, or whatever month you are listening to this in, and I will talk to you next week.