130. The ADHD Framework That Makes Work-Life Balance Possible

If you’ve tried every planner, app, and productivity hack and you’re still exhausted, then this episode is for you. I’m walking you through the exact ADHD-aware framework I use with my coaching clients to help them stop spinning, start finishing things, and build real work-life balance without burning themselves out in the process. This isn’t about doing more. It’s about finally solving the right problem.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why traditional time management tools don’t work for ADHD brains...and what does
• My 3-part coaching framework: self-awareness, systems, and sustainability
• How executive functioning (not discipline or motivation) is the real issue
• What’s actually realistic to change in 90 days, even in a chaotic life
• How to build systems that work on hard days, not just ideal ones

If This Resonates…

If you’re tired of “shoulding” on yourself and ready for support that actually fits your brain, I’d love to help.

You can book a free 1:1 consult where we’ll look at your executive functioning, your processing style, and what kind of structure would actually support you right now. No pressure, no judgment. Let's go. 

To find out how I can help you improve your work-life balance, click here.

Come join the SLP Support Group on Facebook for more tips and tricks!

Learn more about Theresa Harp Coaching here.

Transcript

theresa-harp_1_12-15-2025_141047: 0:27

Hey S LPs, welcome back to the podcast. This is episode one 30. It's one of the final episodes of the calendar year 2025, and I'm excited. So let's dig in. If you're listening to this, chances are that you have tried lots of different things when it comes to time management. Productivity work-life balance, right? You've tried the planners, you've tried the color-coded to-do lists, and the productivity hacks and the fancy new apps, right? And yet chances are you are still struggling. Why is that? Well, I've talked about this a lot on the podcast, but the reason why those things are not the be all end all is because they are strategies, resources, tips, and tricks that were built for brains that don't work the way yours does. And so today what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna walk you through the exact A DHD framework that I use with my coaching clients who are SOPs just like you, to help them finally get a handle on time, on energy, on balance, on to-do lists without burning out in the process, without completely hustle, hustle, hustle, and blowing up their life. So if this is something that resonates with you, if this speaks to you, I'm gonna be going a lot deeper into this inside my free webinar, which is scheduled to take place. The same day that this episode is going to air, it's Tuesday, December 16th at 8:00 PM Eastern on Zoom. It's called Work-Life Balance for SLPs with A DHD. You can find the link in the show notes if you happen to be listening to this before that workshop goes live. Again, that is December 16th, 8:00 PM Eastern on Zoom. If you can be there live, fantastic. But if you can't sign up anyway so that you can get access to the recording, because I'll be sharing that with anyone who registers. Okay? And if you're listening to this and it's after December 16th at 8:00 PM Eastern, don't worry, uh, we will be doing. Similar stuff just like this in the future. So you can always reach out to me directly. You can send me a DM on Facebook or reach out, schedule a consult. We can talk through different resources that I have to support you. Okay? But today I wanna talk through what is realistic in terms of 90 days and the changes that you can make when it comes to work-life balance and productivity. Okay. Now, this is not about promising you things that I can't deliver on. This is not about, you know, magic and, uh, like waving a magic wand and, and everything is rainbows and butterflies and unicorns. No, but this is about showing you what is possible. Okay? What is possible. I think we often overestimate. The things that we can accomplish in a year, and then we underestimate what we can actually get done in a short amount of time. Now, that might be, I could make a case for the opposite, but if you are somebody who is just like, I know that I'm struggling with this and I wanna make changes, but I just don't see any way out, or I don't see any way that things can be different now this is for you. Okay? So. Let me talk you through what. The actual problem is, and I told you that a lot of the productivity stuff, the productivity tips, strategies, all of that stuff is designed for a neurotypical brain, right? Typically, those types of techniques were designed by people who are neurotypical, and they were designed for people who are neurotypical, whether the those experts and guru gurus realize it or not. But here's the thing. For those of you who are listening, present company included myself, right? We don't necessarily have a neurotypical brain, and the problem isn't that you have too much to do and not enough time. The problem is executive functioning, right? So maybe you make a plan. You don't follow it. Maybe you are doing all the air quotes right things and you're still drowning. Maybe you follow those tips and strategies and they work for a little while, and then they fizzle out and you forget all about them. Maybe you're constantly busting your ass and working, but you never feel like you're caught up. Maybe. You feel like you're managing your job and your home life and your overactive brain, that never turns off all day long. It's not that you're necessarily bad at time management, it's just that you're solving for the wrong problem. You're solving for time. You're not solving for executive functioning. This is an executive functioning issue. Executive functioning issues, right? It's not about discipline, it's not about motivation, it's about executive functioning. So think about it like this. I think about this every night when I try to do any type of home task and I'm tired and my meds have worn off, and. I am, you know, I've got a lot of distractions, so this comes up for me a lot during meal time, like, uh, making dinner or cleaning up dinner and getting ready for, like, getting the kids ready for bed and all of that stuff. So, which by the way, I. Have, I have four kids. Um, my eldest are twins. They're 10, and then I have an 8-year-old and a 6-year-old. And they are spicy, like spicy, wild, energetic kids and it is a lot in our house. It is a lot. So. I share that just so that you know if you're listening, that this is not about ideal circumstances. Ideal scenarios, and creating like picture perfect environments so that you can function and get things done. I mean, yeah, that's great. Sure. That'd lovely. But the reality is the stuff that you know that we're trying to do and accomplish, we're trying to do and accomplish these things in less than ideal. Circumstances, right? In chaotic environments, in very, uh, you know, a lot of, a lot of the time anyway. And it would be so easy to tell yourself that, well, you know, there's just, I just have too much on my plate and, you know, there's no way that I can get all these things done and I need more time, more help, less. Things on my list, so on and so forth. Now, some of those things might be true to certain degrees, but the thing is, is you're overlooking how your executive functioning skills are showing up or not showing up in these moments. And the good news. The good news here is that we already know a lot about executive functioning as SLPs. In this world, we already have some sort of foundational knowledge at least, and some of us have more than that. So we've got. The, we've got some nice tools in our toolbox, so to speak, that we can utilize, but for whatever reason, and I, well, I know what reasons, but I'm, that's not what this podcast episode is about, but for different reasons, we can't always execute. We can't always do what we do for others. Or like take what we do for others, like our clients and do it with ourselves. So if we start thinking about this from an executive functioning standpoint, not a discipline standpoint, not a motivation issue, right? It starts to become more manageable. So like I was saying, this comes up for me at the end of the day when I'm trying to make dinner. Even if it's something that I make all the time that I know how to make, it's familiar. I could do it in my sleep, right? Even when it's a situation like that, a recipe like that, my executive functioning skills fail me. They fail me to like. With time and time again, they fail me in those moments. And once I started thinking about, okay, how can I approach this from an executive functioning standpoint, things started to become more manageable. So think about how many steps it takes to make a meal from start to finish, right? Finding the recipe, deciding what you're gonna do, um, figuring out what the ingredients are. Do you have all of those ingredients? Gathering the ingredients? Thinking about the sequencing of steps, right? If you go through and do all the steps of the recipe, but you haven't preheated the oven, right? You're gonna have a problem. You're gonna now have to wait for the oven to preheat and warm up before you can start putting. Your, your food into the oven to bake. So there's sequencing, there's, there's measuring and, um, organizing your materials. There's the, uh, cleanup piece, which is like a whole other beast in and of itself, right. There's, so I could go on and on. There are so many steps involved, and I've talked about this before on the podcast and. I'm talking about right now, giving you the example of cooking. This could be absolutely any task. It could be something as simple as sending an email, you know, seemingly simple as sending an email, right? Doing the dishes. Like absolutely anything. Everything and anything we do. Involves executive functioning skills, and if you have a DHD or suspect that you do, chances are you struggle with executive functioning skills, right? When clients come to me, when coaching clients come to me, they are exhausted. They've tried all the tips, all the ideas, all the hacks, and none of them have stuck. But here's what does stick a framework that's built for their brain, and this is what I do with my coaching clients, is we utilize this framework that I have created a coaching framework that guides my sessions, guides our planning, and we take it and tailor it. To your individual brain, your individual values, your individual circumstances, so that we're building a system that works for you. So I'm gonna talk you through what these sort of three parts of this framework are and what becomes possible when we incorporate this. Into your day-to-day life with the help of a coach. And of course you can do this on your own as well. Absolutely. You could do this with other coaches, you could do this on, on your own. You could do this with accountability buddies. I'm just talking you through what I do with coaching clients and the progress that they get when we're working together in just 90 days. Alright, so the three components of this framework. I'm gonna give you all three, and then I'm gonna break them down one by one. Okay. So the three components of this framework are self-awareness, s systems, and sustainability. Okay. At a very. On a very basic level, so self-awareness systems and strategies, and then sustainability. Now, when we're talking about self-awareness, this also in incorporates or involves mindset. This is where we're looking at what's the inner dialogue that's happening or the inner monologue that's happening. This is when we start taking. Your brain. Let's say that you and I are working together. Okay? You're my coaching client, so we're going to take your brain, your thoughts, your beliefs, your perspectives, and bring them up to the surface so that you can start, number one, noticing them. So many of us are walking around, or let's be honest, running around like chickens with our heads cut off in go mode, right? We are go, go, go, do, do, do. Not enough time. Too much to do, not enough time. I've gotta be going. And when we are in that autopilot, we are not in a place of self-awareness. We're not noticing what's happening. We're in it. We're in it. So we're not aware. While we're in it of what's going on. So the first thing that we're working on, and if you and I were working together, the first thing we would do is look at your self-awareness and your mindset, right? Of course, you're overwhelmed. Because you've been in Go mode all the time. You're constantly racing to get things done while you're working on one thing. You're thinking about a million other things that you have on your to-do list. Maybe you are trying to figure out where to start, right? Maybe you've got a long list of things to do and you're trying to figure out where to start and you're stuck. Maybe you are. In go mode where you're doing, you're doing all the things, but you have very little awareness in the moment of how you are doing them, of the stress that you're bringing to the table, the energy that you're bringing, the executive functioning breakdowns that are happening in the moment, right? It's really hard to make change when you are not aware of what's happening. This is sort of that metacognitive piece that is Yes, an executive functioning skill that we struggle with. Those of us who have a DHD and we start working on it, we have to bring it up. It's a skill that can be taught, it's a skill that can be built. It's a skill that can be, you know, strengthened over time, which is the good news, but we bring that up to the forefront and start. Building that self-awareness, and we go through strategies of how to tap into the self-awareness, how to slow down and become mindful, how to notice what's happening in the moment, right? So that is at a very surface level, the self-awareness and mindset aspect of this three piece framework. The second piece of this. Like I said, systems, systems and strategies. Now, this is the part where everyone, this is the part that everyone focuses on, the piece that everybody thinks is the solution, and I'm not necessarily arguing that per se, but when we work on this piece of strategizing. Creating systems and strategies. When we do this without the self-awareness in part one of our framework, and without the integration in sustainability in part three of the framework, the systems that we're using then and the strategies that we're using are a lot less effective. So this isn't just about me giving you a strategy. This is about. Knowing yourself well enough and having a. You know, a sounding board, having somebody who is listening to what you are saying, who notices patterns, who can remind you of previous experiences, who can ask you questions to help increase your awareness so that the systems and strategies that we come up with are things that are tailored to your brain. This is where we cut out all the noise of the productivity experts and gurus, and we take. What we know or what we suspect will work for you. This is about coming up with routines that flex right lists that will work when your brain isn't functioning on all cylinders. This is about. Giving you actual tangible strategies that are designed for the way that you think they're designed for the way that you operate, so that it helps your brain dial in. Execute. So for example, one of the things that I'll do with clients is look at the different ways that they process information. And so I have this whole, you know, sensory processing or processing modality work workflow that we go through and we come up and we look at, we come up with, you know, strategies that are tailored to the way that you process information. Best. Some people process information cognitively like, okay, I need to learn about this strategy. I need to read up on it. I need to understand, I need to, you know, sort of study it and educate myself and. Think about it. And that helps me learn and do it. Some people process information verbally. I am definitely a verbal processor. My clients know this about me. I have to talk it through out loud in order for me to understand it. Sometimes I have to write it out out loud and write it out and while talking out loud in order for me to understand information. Right. So, and I don't mean to suggest that we. That we only process information one way. It's looking at all the different ways that you process information, and then taking that and utilizing it and building it into your strategies. So if you are somebody who is highly visual. Then we create visual workflows, visual reminders. We incorporate these visual components into the strategies so that your brain can easily access what's going on and what it needs to know in order to utilize the strategies. Right? So figuring out what's gonna work for you. Then building that into the strategies so that you're not fighting with your brain. The strategies that you're using are going right along with your brain. Hopefully that is making sense. And then in part three of this framework, if you recall, I said sustainability, which also. Involves the integration. So we've come up with, we've, you know, built this self-awareness. We are designing systems and strategies that will work for your brain, and then we integrate. We assess for learning and sustainability. So this piece of the framework is about you execute, right? You practice and implement the strategies, and then you come back to the next session and we talk about how did it go? What did you learn even if you didn't execute the strategy this week, even if you didn't implement the things that we had had planned for or discussed, that in and of itself is learning. So we talk about that. Okay. Where did the integration. Breakdown happen and why? What are you making it mean? Are you making this mean that you have failed? Well, did you fail or did we actually need to, maybe we didn't plan for or anticipate X, Y, Z happening. Maybe we underestimated A, B, C. Maybe we noticed that, oh, this strategy that we thought was gonna be useful for your brain. Now that we know that you tr you know, now that you went and tried it or, or attempted to try it and didn't, what will we do differently so that next time you are implementing something and how do you do this without judgment, without you, I'm not judging you, but how do you do it without judging yourself? Without beating yourself up? And we look at how sustainable are these strategies for. Your brain and your lifestyle, right? There's a strategy is no good if it is requiring you to bend over backwards and bust your ass to utilize that strategy. If the strategy is exhausting, it's not sustainable. So we wanna be able to figure out how can we make this sustainable, not just on a short-term basis, but on a long-term basis, not just on an ideal day where everything goes according to plan. Because we all know how often those days happen, right? But more importantly, on the rough days, on the days where shit hits the fan and things don't go according to plan. Right? A DHD coaching. Is not just about what to do this week, but how to keep doing it, and what changes do we need to make so that you can keep doing it again and again. Whether we have to adjust the strategy, adjust the mindset, adjust the circumstances, that's what it's about. That's what the power of coaching is about. It's not about being perfect. It's about building up the three pieces of this framework. Your self-awareness strategies that match your brain and sustainability so that you can work through this in the moment when it happens, you can problem solve, you can troubleshoot. You become the one. Who's got your back? I've always got your back. Sure. But you need to have your own back. And that is what we do in coaching. That's what we build in coaching, right? Here's what becomes possible. When you create a plan that matches your brain, your executive functioning skills, your lifestyle, you actually start tasks. Not just start them, but you finish them with less mind drama, with less stress, with less overwhelm. You stop ghosting your to-do list your commitments, and you start showing up. You can plan your week without spiraling, and more importantly, you can adjust when plans change without spiraling, you can leave work on time. Without feeling guilty, you can actually start to enjoy some free time. Again, without that pressure and anxiety of, oh my gosh, I should be doing X, Y, Z, because we have planned for this. We have put in systems that will help you get done what needs to get done and work through the mind drama when your brain starts to spiral. This is, again, not about being perfect. It's not about getting everything done all the time when you say it's gonna get done and being perfectly in control of your time. No. I mean, yes, I would love that if that, if that were, that were true, but. That's not what it's about. It's about knowing that you are in the driver's seat. Yes. But that you can handle the hiccups, the curve balls, the things that happen, that you've got your back. That even when things don't get done, your whole world doesn't fall apart the way that it used to. Right. You know that the, the magic is not in the product, the planner, the app, the strategy, right? The magic is within you. It's within your thinking, your brain, your awareness, your perspectives, your ability to show up for yourself time and time again. And that is what is possible. When we are working on executive functioning skills in coaching, so if this is hitting home for you or if it's peaking your interest, I am walking through this framework. And really digging into the executive functioning aspects of this and how to use it in your own life. In tonight's webinar, workshop, whatever you wanna call it, work-life balance for SLPs with A DHD. So if you happen to be listening to this before 8:00 PM on Tuesday, December 16th, 2025, click the link in the show notes, register, come live if you can. If not as long as you're registered, you'll get access to the replay. But more importantly, if this is hitting home, and chances are it's after 8:00 PM Eastern December 16th, 2025, book a consult, the link to to schedule a consult is always in the show notes. It is free. There's no cost. And what we do during that one hour consult is look at. These three pieces of that framework, what is your mindset? What is your self-awareness like? What is your processing style like? How do you process information? Where are your executive functioning challenges? And then what could we do to create a plan that works for you? I would be happy. To be there and partner with you through that process. So as always, click the link in the show notes, schedule a consult. There is no cost, but I promise you will walk away with a better understanding of what you need to do to create work life balance for you. All right. That is it for today's episode. Hope to see you at tonight's workshop, and as always, make sure you're back here next week for another episode, all about work-life balance for SLPs. I'll talk to you then.